So, did you come through the Thanksgiving Holiday okay?
If it’s your first one since your Divorce Over 50, it was probably rough. Even if it was your sixth, as it was for me, it still doesn’t feel quite right. My young adult children were in town, and this was my year to have them join my family’s Thanksgiving dinner. Which was great. But it’s still odd to be sharing them with my ex-wife, as they spent some nights at my place, and some at hers. It’s strange to hear about them going to a “Second Night of Thanksgiving” at her and her new husband’s house. And I missed being in a home on Thanksgiving Day when the meal was being cooked — I used to revel in the smells, the warmth, just the whole feel of that experience.
And now, the Christmas/Hanukkah/Kwanza/New Years Holidays loom.
I recently did a series of interviews with Silke Schwarzkopf, the Executive Producer of 2ndAct.tv. Silke’s site contains a ton of videos that will be of tremendous interest to Divorced Over 50 users. I encourage you to explore 2ndAct.tv, and benefit from the important content you’ll find there.
In the videos offered here, we discuss such topics as the genesis of DivorcedOver50.com, how common Divorce is among our age group, and some of the warning signs that a DO50 may be coming up.
Technology has changed so many aspects of our lives, and dating is no exception.
For many Divorced Over 50’s, the last time you dated involved a phone call over a land line, or perhaps a note written on a piece of lined notebook paper.
There’s no doubt that the new technology can make dating much easier, and give you many more opportunities to meet someone. But it would be a mistake to jump into that brave new world without doing some preparation.
To really increase the flow of information you’re receiving on this topic, may we suggest you visit (and hopefully become a regular reader of) the Positive Health Wellness website?
The site is extremely comprehensive, with pages covering Diet & Nutrition, Recipes, Fitness, Beauty & Aging, and Pain Relief. It also offers a ton of Infographics. Because the site is aimed at basically everyone, you will have to search a bit for content that applies to your specific needs and interests. Just looking at its front page as of this writing, DO50 readers will have no need for a piece about Nutrition for Breastfeeding Moms, but may be interested in Workouts You Can Do Without Weights.
And when you find an article of interest, you’re going to get more facts and details than you could have imagined. Let’s say you’ve heard a lot of talk about the benefits of coconut oil, and want to get more information. Well, a quick search on Positive Health Wellness will turn up a number of pieces, including this Ultimate Guide to Coconut Oil, which clocks in at over 4000 words, plus multiple infographics. (Spoiler alert: That stuff is good for you).
So take a look at Positive Health Wellness, and make sure to bookmark it. The site could be a really valuable resource to you now, and for many years to come (if you follow its recommendations…).
Many visitors to Divorced Over 50 are either Di-Curious, or in the very early stages of their Divorce. If that’s you, it means that final decisions about post-Divorce finances have not been made, so there’s still time to get it right.
The piece offers ten ways you can prevent a Divorce from ruining your finances. Some are obvious, some you’ve likely heard before. But it’s worth taking a look and keeping the suggestions in mind.
The tips include:
Prepare for a new career ASAP. For a non-working spouse, as soon as you know Divorce is even a possibility, start planning to go back to work. Polish your skills and start networking immediately.
Don’t get emotional about your home or other items. Many people are emotionally attached to their home, but staying in it may cause significant financial hardship. And don’t spend more money fighting over sentimental items than they’re actually worth.
Hire your own team of professionals — get an attorney, accountant, or even financial planner who’s working just for you.
Don’t forget about insurance. When one spouse has a financial obligation to the other, that person has to have both life and disability insurance in case something goes wrong.
And if you want to dig deeper on the topic, here’s a piece from a Certified Financial Planner that’s also a good overview on the topic.
As you’ll see in her article, she cites a number of reasons why we older guys make better lovers. These include the fact that we’re not in a hurry, we put our partner’s needs first, and we know that intercourse is not the only way to have great sex.
No matter what stage of your Divorce Over 50 you’re in, maintaining your health is important. We all know that, of course — but some of us are too lazy, or have other priorities, or are so confused over conflicting advice that we give up and do nothing.
The piece covers all the important categories, including nutrition, physical exercise, and mental sharpness.
Here are some of the basic points; check out the article for the full details
Nutrition: Choose healthy fats, cut sodium, and take in the right kinds of fruits, vegetables, and dairy.
Physical Exercise: Build strength, improve your balance, and keep your joints healthy.
Mental Sharpness: Fill an empty nest, keep learning, stay social, have a lot of sex.
And perhaps the most important tip in the whole piece: It’s never too late to start taking care of your health. Even if it’s poor, even if you’ve never done much about it before, changing your habits now can still make a big difference in your life going forward.
Forgiveness is one of the most important steps a person can take in working through the Three Stages of his or her Divorce. Whether it’s forgiving a spouse who wronged you, forgiving yourself for the role you played in the Divorce, or a combination, it’s only to your benefit. Holding on to anger and pain only hurts you, and can affect your future relationships.
As we know, however, it’s easier said than done. And especially if you were the victim of a betrayal, it can be very difficult to reach that point of letting it go.
Dr Christiane Northrup, MD is a board certified OB/GYN and a past president of the American Holistic Medical Association. She’s also a New York Times bestselling author.
In an article for Vibrant Nation, she asserts that the reason women Over 50 experience a decreased libido is not because of menopause, but rather because they’re locked into an old way of thinking about, and having, sex.
Lots of things change when you go through a Divorce.
In addition to ending your relationship with your spouse, you may also lose connections with friends. You may have to move into a new house or apartment. And for a significant number of people, it means going back to work.
Traditionally, it’s the formerly stay-at-home-mom who has to rejoin the working world, but it can certainly happen to men, as well.
And for Over 50’s who need to return to work after decades out of the job market, the process can be daunting.