So you’ve met somebody fabulous, and things are going great. It’s only natural you’d want to avoid saying anything that might create an issue or make you less appealing. But did you ever consider that not being fully honest could actually do more harm than good?
That’s the point Dr. Randi Gunther makes in this piece, arguing that not being truthful prevents the other person from getting to know the real you. And that when you cover up your past, hide your true feelings, or downplay your preferences, you’re actually putting yourself at a tremendous disadvantage. You can only keep that up so long, and eventually the truth will come out — often destroying the relationship. Which is actually a double loss, since you’ve also lost the time you’ve spent with the wrong person.
Dr. Gunther, whose piece on “Four Traits of a Keeper” we linked to previously, says the early phase of a relationship is the best time to be completely authentic. There’s an abundance of positivity when a couple is first getting to know each other, and forgiveness is abundant. Additionally, the more open you are, the more open your partner is likely to be. And this mutual honesty is really the best way for each of you to determine if you’re a good fit.
Dr. Gunther’s Heroic Love site has a lot to offer, including a free newsletter. It’s definitely worth checking out.
