So, did you come through the Thanksgiving Holiday okay?
If it’s your first one since your Divorce Over 50, it was probably rough. Even if it was your sixth, as it was for me, it still doesn’t feel quite right. My young adult children were in town, and this was my year to have them join my family’s Thanksgiving dinner. Which was great. But it’s still odd to be sharing them with my ex-wife, as they spent some nights at my place, and some at hers. It’s strange to hear about them going to a “Second Night of Thanksgiving” at her and her new husband’s house. And I missed being in a home on Thanksgiving Day when the meal was being cooked — I used to revel in the smells, the warmth, just the whole feel of that experience.
And now, the Christmas/Hanukkah/Kwanza/New Years Holidays loom.
Forgiveness is one of the most important steps a person can take in working through the Three Stages of his or her Divorce. Whether it’s forgiving a spouse who wronged you, forgiving yourself for the role you played in the Divorce, or a combination, it’s only to your benefit. Holding on to anger and pain only hurts you, and can affect your future relationships.
As we know, however, it’s easier said than done. And especially if you were the victim of a betrayal, it can be very difficult to reach that point of letting it go.
If your Divorce has already worked its way through the court system, this post won’t do you much good (though it will have info you can pass along to others, or keep in mind if your next marriage doesn’t work out, either…)
But if you’re Divorce-Curious, still living together though someone’s leaving soon, or in the initial stages of your split, you will be faced with an important decision: File for Divorce, or start with a legal separation? Different states have different laws, so your location may affect your choices. But if you have an option, there are a number of factors you may want to consider.
If you’ve just joined the ranks of the Divorced Over 50’s, or you’re in the process of doing so, chances are excellent you feel like crap. Whether you wanted the split or not, you’re hurting. A lot. A lot of the time.
It may seem hard to believe right now, but you will get through this. And at some point, eventually, you’re going to emerge a better, stronger, happier, more secure person.
From Men’s Health, here are some quick tips for looking good and staying fit when you’re Over 50. According to the piece, aerobic exercise is not only good for your cardio-vascular system, it helps with memory, too. Huh, that sounds familiar, just can’t quite place it…
Going through a divorce means dividing up everything you acquired as a couple. The distribution of the financial assets is decided by mediation or court order; it can go easily, or be very difficult and painful. When it comes to dividing the friends, however, there is no controlling authority… and very often it’s filled with difficulty and pain.
Here’s a solid article about five nutrients we Over 50’s need to be sure we’re consuming. It not only tells you what you need, but includes information on why you need it, and ways you can get it.
The writer, Debra Witt, adds a really interesting point at the very end: We are so inundated with reports about new dietary discoveries that it’s important to check them out with your doctor or a registered dietitian before making any changes. She says that many insurance plans will cover a dietitian visit just because you’re Over 50; the likelihood increases if you’re being treated for a chronic condition like diabetes, high blood pressure, or high cholesterol (and how many of us are not being treated for something like that?). So check with your provider — it could be a great opportunity to improve your health on your insurance company’s dime.